Liberty Deffenbaugh

“If you lose someone, but find yourself, you won.” – Anonymous

She/Her/Hers

Bowie State University/May 2022 – Master of Arts in Counseling Psychology

Currently in school at Modern Sex Therapy Institutes – PhD in Clinical Sexology, Projected graduation: May 2024

Not currently accepting new clients.

What’s therapy with me like? I focus on ethical non-monogamy, alternative lifestyles such as BDSM and Leather, as well as anxiety and depression using an eclectic approach with various modalities, woo and neuroscience.

I especially enjoy existential and parts work modalities, as they create a holistic view of the person paired with an understanding of the wider world. Their flexibility to be paired with one another makes them great puzzle pieces for aiding in better health and wellness. We are dynamic beings with ever evolving experiences, so we should be treated as such.

In session, I focus on your whole self, where you’ve come from, the path you’ve taken and continue to travel. We discuss mental, sexual and physical health in addition to your emotional health. Therapy with me is initially lead by you, with a lot of talking and getting to know your ins and outs. In time, I will offer observations that aren’t always comfortable but intended to help our work together. There will be puns involved, so prepare to lower your walls and really reconnect with yourself in our sessions. This is your time and I cannot be doing more work than you are, so be prepared to have uncomfortable conversations with yourself in and outside of session!

Sessions with me are telehealth, but please be in a solo, quiet and confidential space so we can speak freely and do the work. Furry loved ones are always welcome and I usually have at least one of my dogs during our sessions. My sessions are very safe spaces where you can be your full authentic self and get into some less than happy topics. I view my role in therapy as a shepherding cheerleader, celebrating your wins and supporting your harder moments, finding that therapeutic relationships work best when people can be their authentic self, especially if there’s ugly crying involved. I am incredibly passionate about my work and my clients!

How I’ve kept learning… I am constantly learning! Right now, I am working on a PhD in Clinical Sexology, working towards being an AASECT certified Sex Therapist, and am eagerly anticipating the start of my Equitable Care Certification program where I get to focus on the needs of sex workers! In addition to being in graduate school, I am a member of the American Psychological Association, the American Counseling Association, the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists, as well as the Licensed Clinical Professional Counselors of Maryland. Each provides opportunities for continued learning. I also educate myself through other workshops done by groups including The Affirmative Couch, The Transgender Training Institute and GenderU. As you can tell from my “What I’ve Learned Lately” section, I love to learn and am always on the hunt for more education!

Who do I work with? Adults, individuals, couples, and polycules who are kinky, polyamorous/ethically non-monogamous, and/or LGBTQ+. 

My impacting identities are… I carry with me many identities, including a learner, a helper and an empath. I am a neurodivergent, gothy and nerdy married, pansexual, polyamorous, agnostic, woman who struggles with the confines of boxes that we are asked to put ourselves into. I walk through the world as a white woman and was raised in two very contrasting spaces, being raised multi-cultural. Maryland and the Caribbean were quite contrasting spaces, but it gave me tremendous experiences in dual worlds and I carry the island blue waters in my veins. I have spiritual practices that incorporate world religions and existential outlooks, finding peace in the impermanence and perfect imperfection in nature. I am part of Leather traditions and BDSM practices including a 24/7 power exchange relationship. I have lived with my two partners for years and exist in an incredible kitchen table poly household full of love and dogs. I have PTSD-C from domestic violence and sexual assault trauma, as well as ADHD, depression and anxiety, which I actively work on. I’ve have very contrasting lived experiences and believe that anyone can be anything. I can be sarcastic, direct, and quite hilarious. People have described me in polarizing opposites, but I view myself as part of a whole in this big Universe of ours. 

I feel allied/aware/informed/knowledgeable about… alternative lifestyles (member/knowledgeable), neurodiversity (member/knowledgeable), BDSM (member/knowledgeable), LGBTQ+ (member/knowledgeable), Polyamory/Ethical non-monogamy (practicing and knowledgeable), BIPOC (ally/knowledgeable), military/service members (ally), alternative spiritual practices (member/knowledgeable), higher education (member/knowledgeable), returning students (member/knowledgeable), body modification (member/knowledgeable), sex workers (lived experience/knowledgeable), humanitarianism and environmentalism.

I am the best fit for a client who… wants to explore themselves and their world with a mixture of woo and neuroscience, especially clients who enjoy being challenged. For a client who is ready to do the work, be open and talkative, I’m definitely your girl. I am a great fit for anyone who is exploring their sexual and gender identities, with great care and knowledge for trans persons (I’m even trained in writing Gender Affirming Surgical letters!). I’m a great fit for anyone who enjoys what alternative lifestyles can provide, as well as open minded clients who are seeking peace and stability. If you’re looking for a down-to-earth and real person to talk to with occasional sarcasm, swearing and dad jokes, then we would be a great fit!

I am not a good fit for a client who… thinks that showing up in session is enough to count as “doing therapy” or those who are not emotionally mature enough to recognize their , those that have complex concerns such as Borderline Personality Disorder, which I am not yet skilled enough to treat. I am also not a good fit for a client seeking a religious basis for treatment or who is offended by swearing. I am also not a good fit for someone seeking a rigid or structured approach with assigned workbooks.

What makes me unique? I am a very proud weirdo, living authentically as myself and making my best attempts to practice mindful radical honesty. I’m a Covered Master in Leather and have very much included the tenants of Honor, Integrity and Respect into my life. I live in a kitchen table poly household, making me uniquely empathetic to the highs and lows of polyamory and the dynamics within multiple relationships. When it comes to the populations I focus on, I definitely walk the walk!

 

The Practical Stuff

What insurances do I accept? I am in network with Carefirst BCBS and Evernorth (previously known as Cigna). I do not accept insurance for couples/relationship therapy. Please see our Rates and Insurance page for more information.

Do I offer telehealth or in person sessions? I currently do telehealth sessions only.

 

The Fun Stuff

Did you know…I have over 75 tattoos and am always adding more! I was also a speaker at my graduation! 

Any pets? I have 3 Pinschers: a Doberman (Max), German (Lola) & Miniature (Frank)! At least one is in my office at any given time (usually Max), so feel free to ask to see them!

How to Give me A Buzz

The best way to contact me is… by email at l.deffenbaugh@honeybwellness.com.

 

Supervised By:

Tracy Lieb, LCSW-C